What Is a Husband's Biggest Mistake?
First presented in a public seminar at the Aesthetic Realism Foundation, New York City.

I know with my happy life that the scientific principles of Aesthetic Realism can enable husbands to be proud and kind.

I learned that the biggest mistake a husband makes is to dislike the world. As a result, he can: 1) try to have a cozy, exclusive nest with his wife, apart from the world; 2) try have a victory over the world that she represents, by managing her, feeling superior to her. These are contempt, they make for hell in marriage and great shame in men, and learning about this is liberating.

If a man does not like the world, doesn't want to know it deeply, he can't do any better with his wife. In his 1949 lecture, "Mind and Husbands," Mr. Siegel writes:

Aesthetic Realism accuses the husbands of America of not wanting to know their wives....He will try to be gallant, bring her presents, will smile, make a living, but is not trying to know her. The wife also doesn't want to be known, but the husband could cut through the superficial appearance of [that] and say, "Darling, I insist on knowing you, and if you see me get lazy on the subject, please pinch me, because once I sum you up we both might as well be dead."

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